Bom Dia! and welcome to the season seven finale with Nick and his Wolves of the Portuguese variety. Their form has been up and down more than Ruben Amorim’s heart rate lately, but can they get it together for the remaining nine games to mount a title challenge? Over to Nick…

To be in fourth place is quite remarkable considering some of the results we’ve had so far. It’s all about the draws really, there have been far too many of them. If we’d won just half of them, we’d now be top of the table…

We start this week at Villa Park, where we manage just two shots on target all game, and man of the match, José Veiga keeps it goalless to earn us a point. Better than nothing, I guess.

Our front line are back to misfiring again in a damp squib of a performance at home to Middlesbrough. There’s no chance we’re winning this title now, but thankfully Coventry fluffed their lines as well, and we stay 4th…

We’re holding our own against Everton until Anselmo stupidly gets himself sent off, and despite a commendable effort with ten men, we slump to second successive defeat, and slip down to 6th in the table.

Rock bottom Chelsea finally take pity on us, but only after their keeper gets sent off. With no sub on the bench, Solskjaer dons the gloves and it’s goodnight. It’s a sad state of affairs when this is the only way we can win…

You’d think that a trouncing like that would do wonders for our confidence, but it actually does quite the opposite, and once again we fall victim to another Hedman and Scholes show as Coventry send us back down to 8th place…

Both my centre backs are suspended, so Abel Xavier is moved inside, and my backup left back, Rui Jorge lasts 3 minutes, so I’m forced to play my backup right back, Vicente at left back, which seems ominous, but somehow we manage to defy the odds and win!

It seems beating United twice in a row back in December stirred up a hornet’s nest (so them wearing their black and yellow kit is quite fitting), and this time they sting us. Our keeper getting sent off doesn’t help, and the win crowns our opponents champions…

Our last two games are away, starting with Sheffield Wednesday. After a frantic start, the game settles down, and we’re almost denied the win with a disallowed goal and last minute scramble in our own goal, but we do enough…

The season ends at Sunderland, who have just won the UEFA Cup. We’re 5th, and can still finish 4th, but could also finish as low as 9th all depending on other results, but let’s just try and do our bit first before anything else…

We waste countless chances to go ahead and eventually pay the price as the season ends with a big whimper. We finish 7th and get another £8.5m to add to our balance, meaning we now have £68m to spend on nobody…

Apologies but I forgot to get a snip of the final table. We ended up 7th, which unfortunately means no European football next season. F*ck.

Veiga, Picão, Coelho and Anselmo make the Portugal Euro 2004 squad, and since we only had half the normal amount of matches in this week’s episode, we’ll follow their progress again to pass some time…

My phone rings and it’s Jorgey. He tells me that José Dominguez, who rejected me years ago, has failed to agree a new contract at Lyon, so I’m quickly in there to sign him for just £62k…

First through the exit door is Vicente, who joins Rectreativo…

Portugal have the pleasure of opening the Euros against host nation, Italy, where Veiga is man of the match as he earns his side a point as it ends all-square…

Their next match is a bit of an upset, as Yugoslavia stun them with a 3-2 win…

Which means they have to beat Wales to stand any chance of going through to the knockouts. They don’t, and they head home disappointed.

Here’s how Portugal’s group ended up, and for anyone wondering, Holland went on to win it.

I wanted this boy when he first regenerated, but Eibar beat me to him, so I’m happy to finally get him for £375k from Barcelona, where he got bored of warming the bench…

And that arrival means that I can now release Barroso, who like Capucho, was great in the first division, but never quite cut it in the big time…

I’ve been unimpressed by Domingos’ regen’s performances out on loan the last couple of seasons, so I’m happy to let him go…

Thanks to a resurrection halfway through the season, Coelho ended up winning the golden boot with 26 goals, which is remarkable considering how many games he went without scoring to begin with. Fair play, lad.

I release a couple more to free up some space in the squad. Sa Pinto was first choice for a while, and never let me down when called upon, and Pauleta had a good couple of seasons in a row and then went off the boil…

I try for Paulo Sousa’s regen, but am beaten to him by Atletico Madrid. He’ll get bored of not playing eventually…

Three more regens come in, starting with Mozer, a creative right winger…

Secretario is the same but on the opposite side with more pace and not bad striker stats…

And Hugo is another option for up top…

So here’s the squad after those bits of business. Pires will hopefully go, and possibly Rui Jorge as well, and I still have to decide who to loan out, but I’m reasonably happy…

It’s been a disappointing season, especially after it started so well with winning the Charity Shield. After our first taste of Champions League football, it will be hard not having it next season, but that has made me more determined than ever to win this f*cking league. See you next week. Adeus!