Happy hump day! Did anybody order some VIkings?

Heil og sæl

Velkomin back Viking Champ fans. This week we’re looking to progress in the W/Scr Shield Maiden Trophy, the FA Cup and stamp our authority on the league.

First up this week is Gyllingeham (Gillingham). We have a goal disallowed in the 25th minute due to the referee “seeing something”! It’s a pretty stale game until we make a change in the 66th min bringing on a striker for a wing back. We score 2 mins later only to concede 4 mins after!

We visit 19th placed Wrytelhamm (Wrexham) hoping to get our campaign back on track. 5 mins of solid pressure from the kick off see us score. As per usual, a loose ball by our centre half results in us conceding, then our Keeper Nokling plays a dreadful backpass into his own net! Who the fuck was he passing it back to? Ivar gets us the equaliser then in the last 10 mins it’s all Wrexham. We score against the run of play only to concede straight from kick off! Why is it every keeper has a stormer against me and ours has wet parchment for hands?

Preoston (Preston) come to town and I put Half Dan back in to the side following his injury to sure up our midfield even though he’s only 86% fit. He puts in a MOM performance while the Wonderkid and Ivar score to give us the 3 points. Fenn gets a consolation at the end.

Sutton (Plymouth) sail up to us and thankfully go home empty handed. It’s all us from the kick off then James scores with their first shot at goal (I need a new keeper)! Ivar has 3 gilt edge chances at the end of the half to score but misses them all. Bushell in his first game back from injury scores our equaliser then the eventual winner in a 4 min streak. At the end of the game we get informed that he’s going to miss 3 matches for reaching 22 disciplinary points! WTF, it’s only the beginning of November. I think he’s taken the Viking way of life to heart on the football pitch!

We sign a player of Premiership quality to hopefully sure up our leaky defence a bit…

FA Cup time now as we travel to Snotta Inga Ham to battle the County team (Notts C). We make several changes giving some of our fringe players a game and giving Gunnar Halle his debut. A comfortable 5-2 victory with Ivar and Rush bagging a brace each and Jorden getting in on the act too. We get drawn against Cantebrigge (Cambridge) in the next round.

Back in the league we welcome Grimmr’s by (Grimsby) to Bootham Crescent. The Icelandic Wonderkid getting the only goal of the game. Our attendances have started to creep up hitting over 4k for the first time in a league game. We sell our original RWB Wayne Hall for £675k to Notts Forest straight after the game.

Second vs Third now as we travel down to Loitone (Luton). Half Dan gives us another narrow victory scoring just before half time. We then sell Influential centre half Steve Tutill to Birmingham for £2.4m in an offer that was too good to turn down and then Rodney Rowe to Portsmouth for £825k. We bring in Liverpool’s Danish keeper Nielsen on loan.

Nielsen gets put straight into the team for the visit of Prittleuulle (Southend). A professional first half see’s us score 2 without even conceding a shot in reply. In the second half Southend Byrne us by scoring with all of their 3 shots on target. Maybe I was wrong to sub out Nokling after 2 clean sheets? Thankfully we score 2 of our own to ensure we take the points in a 7 goal thriller. Guess who’s being sent back to Liverpool in the morning?

With Nielson being disposed of we bring in defensive reinforcements. D/MC Tommy Gronwold and DLC Christian Karlson join for the combined fee of £80k. They have reasonable stats but I cant say I holding my breath!

Shield Maiden Cup second round now as we entertain Wrytelhamm (Wrexham) for the second time in this post. Nokling is back between the posts and duly lets their first shot on target go past him in what I can only describe as an act of defiance for dropping him in the last game! If he wasn’t the only keeper I have with any semblance of hands I’d blood eagle the little shit! Anyhow, we rally in the second half and will be Doncaster in the Area Quarter Final.

FA Cup 2nd Round vs Cantebrigge (Cambridge). We get Champ Manned out of the cup!!! Wow this game winds me up at times! Ivar misses a pen in the 5th minute, Youngs then scores in the 20th and it’s all us for the rest of the game. We’re just wasteful and Barrett is equal to everything we throw at him. The board are deservedly disappointed with our poor result.

Back in the league and it’s a top of the table clash. We desperately need our keeper to turn up here. Aldehulme (Oldham) immediately race into a 2 goal lead with their first 2 shots on target. Ivar then smashes in yet another hat-trick before half time to put us in the lead. Nokling saves 2 shots in the final 15 mins to ensure we take home the 3 points and replace them at the summit.

We start the second half of the league season away at Ceasterfeld. Brothers Ivar and Half Dan giving us a commanding 3 goal lead at half time. Hodges pulls one back before Sigurd and Wonderboy grab a goal a piece to complete the rout.

At home and we receive Waleshala (Walsall). It’s an early Christmas Present as brothers Half Dan, Ivar and Sigurd all score in the first half. We put Bjorn on pen duties for the second half to see if he can get on the scoresheet. We both score in the 50th min before Big Roger Boli nets in the 85th.

Boxing Day and I think the lads have feasted a little too well. We don’t even turn up and struggle against 10 and then 9 men. Only replying with a penalty after Kite fouls in the box and gets sent off for his troubles! We were Axe Wound (gash)!

We need a good response in the Shield Maiden Cup and duly deliver with a 6 – 2 thrashing of Donceaster. Gislason taking the match ball home with a deserved hat-trick. We’ll meet Grimmr’s by in the Area Semi.

League action now as Brun lea come to town. Sigurd puts us in front against the run of play. Barnes levels shortly after before Gentile proves less than so getting sent off for hacking down Ivar. Sigurd makes them pay 5 mins later and Bushell seals the points late on.

a second home game in a row see’s Bournemowthe sail up the coast and leave with their tails between their legs. Ivar and Bushell getting the job done. We then find out he’ll miss another 2 games for reaching 31 disciplinary points the naughty boy!

Watforda get a good mauling in the first half as the Brothers grab a goal a piece. Bjorn still missing out so gets put into midfield and on pen duties for the second half. Unfortunately it’s not to be and Kennedy grabs a consolation goal with 15 mins left.

Caer Luel (Carlisle) are also sent home packing after Greening tucks away Ivar’s parried shot before him getting in on the act himself later on.

Shield Maiden Semi Final. I tell the lads that this is our trophy and to go out and make the fans proud….. Instead, Andersen gets sent off in the 9th min, Nogan scoring the resulting penalty. We then get Rodgered in the 69th before Blacking out in the 87th. What a way to whimper out of the cup named after our wives lads!

Totally outplayed again in our last game of the post. Knocked out of all cup competitions in the process. We are however sitting pretty at the top of the league and that is now where we can focus all our attention.

I just hope selling off our half decent English players and only being able to bring in Scandinavian dross due to our low reputation won’t come back to bite us in the bum.

Until next week… Morna!