Góðan Dag and Velkomin back to the final installment for this season. Last week we were unceremoniously knocked out of both cups but were knocking on the door of Europe in 6th place with 16 games remaining.

Without further ado, we start this week at home to bottom club Botheltun (who knocked us out of the league cup). Half Dan sets us on our way in the 7th minute and Bye Andersen doubles it in the 11th. CBA then gets his second and Ivar grabs our 4th to give us a commanding lead at half time. The 2nd half flies by until Bjorn gets crocked in the 72nd min. Bolton have a few chances at the end but it remains 4-0. A great start to the week, we should now be safe from relegation should we implode and revenge for the cup defeat.

It’s 4th vs 6th now as we travel down to the future capital to face Uuluuich. We’re the better team throughout the first half but get sucker punched right before half time as Jim bloody Quinn finds the back of the net. Bergkamp doubles it straight from kick off and we’ve a mountain to climb! George gets one back in the 75th min but despite finishing with twice as many shots than Arsenal, Tony Warner puts in a MoM display and we lose 2-1.

No time to dwell on the defeat though as we travel across the Pennines to take on Blacheborne. Molnar comes back in for Ivar following his injury but we put in a shite performance! Blackburn have the better of it in the first half without causing us too much trouble. We do everything in the second half bar put the ball in the back of the net. Finishes 0-0 with Hollund coming of age and getting MoM.

This is then followed up with the visit of 2nd placed Celchyth. We fall behind in the second minute thanks to Le Saux’s replacement Tony Sheridan. This seems to put the fire of Ragnarok in our bellies as Bye Anderson helps himself to 2 goals, Brandal another and De Goey passes it behind himself and into his own net to put us 3-goals to the good at half time. Poyet scores straight from kick off to give Chelsea a sniff before CBA completes his hat-trick 9 mins later and gets his 4th in the 63rd. A massive 6-2 victory and a statement to the rest of the teams around us!

Another home game now as Mydilsburgh sail down the East coast. Molnar gets us off to a dream start by scoring in the 1st minute. It’s all Middlesborough afterwards as they put us under constant pressure. Molnar then breaks away in the 36th min and scores both his and our second. He gets to take home the match pig’s bladder when he scores again in the 57th. He does get a 4th to show whatever CBA can do, he can do better but it gets disallowed. Still it’s 3 goals and 3 points.

Our 3rd home game in a row see’s us host the Mercian Massiv Beorma’s Ham! It’s not the best start this time round as our only fit defensive midfielder Gronvold goes off in the 1st minute. We score 2 in four mins thanks to Gorgeous George and Molnar. CBA gets in on the act in the 68th. Nicky Forster gets Birmingham on the scoresheet but it proves to be just a mere consolation and it’s another 3 goals and 3 points.

As per usual when you travel to Pride Park in this game, you always seem to face an uphill battle to get anything from it. This occasion proves no different as we show our composure in front of the Deoraby goal but cant find a way past Hoult. I make some changes in the second half and it’s sub Ivar who manages to score what turns out to be the winner in the 82nd minute. Derby ending up being wasteful in front of goal in the end and could’ve made us pay.

I put Ivar back in the starting line-up in place of the knackered Molnar for the visit of Loidis. Bjorn also comes back in following his recent injury layoff. Bye Andersen gives us the lead in the 21st min but it only lasts for 9 mins as Dougie Freedman equalises for Leeds. CBA puts us back in front in the 54th and that’s how it stays.

Terrible news as Gorgeous George’s season is now over having torn a hammy in training and is out for 3 months! I hope this doesn’t de-rail our recent form…

We sail round the coast to take on Liuerpul. We have the better chances but can’t finish any of them. Typically we then fall behind to a Steve McManaman strike. Molnar does manage to equalise but Stevie Mac has his shooting boots on today and completes his hat trick either side of a Patrick Berger strike. The ratings indicate that this wasn’t a 4-1 game but unfortunately for us, the scoreline does! That’s also our 5-game winning streak at an end!

The flu ravages our team like our boys do a monastery for the visit of Straetforda. Our plight is worsened when Brandal goes off injured in the 7th minute. Ivar gives us the lead after a quarter of an hour has been played. There’s plenty of action but no goals to show for it in the rest of the half. Hagelund see’s red in the 76th min and Berkovic makes us pay 5 mins later scoring the equaliser for West Ham!

We sail up the coast to Northumbria to take on Monkceaster and their vast array of talent. So what we don’t need is our Keeper being sent off and conceding a penalty in the 16th min. I’ve no sub keeper and having read a recent post regarding copying what the game engine does and to not actually do anything in the instance of receiving a red, I make no changes to personnel nor formation. Left Wingback Heiselberg saves the resulting penalty and puts in a tremendous shift down the flank and in goal! Bye Andersen puts us in the lead straight from kick off in the second half. Gazza equalises for Newcastle 10 mins later but its CBA who has the last laugh by scoring the winner in the the 68th. Heiselberg with the MoM and that’s a superb result in the circumstances….backed up by the board!

Next up we host Sceaf Weds at Bootham Crescent. It’s a first half of little quality as it flies past with nothing to show for it. Molnar lights up the match by scoring 2 in three minutes just after the hour mark. Carbone makes it squeeky bum time in the last 10 mins having gotten one back for Sheffield Weds but we hold out for the win. It feels like we’re starting to grind out results now.

It’s getting to the end of the season and the daft Sat/Mon fixtures. Our players are completely knackered but I’m loath to change things up too much as we travel back down to the capital to take on Totta’s Ham. We score the first 2 goals but unfortunately only one of them was in the right net! It was CBA who opened the scoring only for Bjorn to make a meal of a clearance and smash it into his own net. Nadal scores 2 mins later in what turned out to be the winner.

I hope this doesn’t hurt our chances for European football next season…with 3 games to go, it’s a proper battle between 2nd & 6th. There’s only 5 points separating us but Monkceaster have 2 games in hand.

We’ve suspensions aplenty for the visit of Wunnemanndunne. Thorstvedt makes his prem debut for Hollund, Fuglestad for Heiselberg and Ivar for Molnar. Bjorn starts us off the right way by scoring in the correct goal this week and Brandal gets a first half brace to take us into the break 3-0 up. Kovicevic does score for Wimbledon but it gets disallowed. Substitute Gudjohnsen gets our 4th but overdoes his celebration and comes off injured.

Newcastle, who have played more games than anyone this season having won the league cup, got the the final of both the FA cup and Cup Winners Cup are starting to slip up and were also beaten off Spurs. Our old foes Bristol Rovers do us a favour and beat Chelsea too.

Another Monday night game sees our tired heroes travel back to the future Merseyside for a visit to former champions Eofor. We get absolutely battered but somehow manage to escape with a 0-0 draw! I did consider going for it and making some subs but I’d have definitely have conceded had I done so.

It’s in our hands going into the last game. A win will guarantee us 2nd and a Champions League spot, a draw could see us drop to 3rd and a defeat could see us drop to 5th. Celchyth host Blacheborne, Liuerpul have bottom club Botheltun and we face our FA Cup conquerors Estone.

So, the final day of the season is here and it’s Estone who are trying to play the Villain’s against us once more. Bye Andersen gets us off to a great start by scoring in the 7th min. Villa don’t see the funny side of Cross acting up to his name and his season finishing 70 minutes before everyone else’s! Molnar makes it 2 right on the stroke of half time. I tell the lads more of the same in the second half and not to take their foot off the gas at any point. As per usual, it goes straight in one ear and out the other and Yorke gets a goal back in the 51st minute. Brandal follows up CBA’s blocked shot to restore our 2-goal lead and we get our revenge. The final whistle goes and it’s pandemonium in the stands as swaths of vikings invade the pitch. Absolute Scenes…..Shields, axes, beer, women….everything is being thrown in the air in celebration.

Chelsea and Liverpool both win but it’s 2nd place for us in our first season in the promised land.

We timed our run to perfection…..

Lastly we have the end of season awards…. Christian Bye Andersen gets the Football Writers and Golden Boot Trophies and Christer George receives both the PFA Player and PFA Young Player awards….

Join us next week as we hope to go one better and actually win a trophy and we expand our invasion across European soil as we take on the best of the best in the Champions League.

Oh, and there’s always the small matter of hoovering up regens….

Until then, Morna!