The bitter tears of relegation have nearly dried, it’s time to bounce back and get back into the Premier League as quickly as possible.

We are two years into the challenge and we have another 27 left (end of 2025/26) and in that time we have to achieve the following:

It took a long time to find a tactic that worked for us last season – as it turned out it took us too long. But there are enough raw materials here for an immediate return.

My immediate shopping list is fairly short – A first team DM, a 4th choice Centre Back, a Right Back option to challenge Neil Cox, another AMC and another striker option.

There were a few outs. Greg Strong’s contract expired and he left the club after not featuring at all in the past two years. Dragan Popov lost his work permit so was released from the last year of his deal. Ian Bishop, John Sheridan and Peter Beardsley all retired. Colin Murdock went to Middlesbrough for £2.2m and Keith Gillespie joined Arsenal for £475k.

Wait…

Keith Gillespie? That name hasn’t been mentioned before…

Well. He got released by Newcastle, we signed him and then 15 days later he joined Arsenal after they activated his big club release clause.

Coming in were…. Gillespie (briefly), Swiss defender Stephane Henchoz as a direct replacement for Murdock. Wes Brown comes in from Man United for the season as cover on loan, we’ve also signed Schoolboys Andrew Welsh and Nathan Harford to add further depth to the defence. Harford has the bonus of being a Striker as well. Sean Friars was in the last couple of weeks of his Liverpool deal and joins for £45k as a midfield option and Alejandro Osorio comes from Chile as a rotational AMC. Replacing Gillespie and providing depth on the right is Seth Johnson for the season from Sheffield Wednesday.

I’m still looking for that DMC

5 minutes in and the start already looks ruined. Keeper sent off and 1 down, but we rallied, Osorio gets a debut goal before Alan Thompson gets a treble. We let a 2 goal lead slip away.

Defensively we are an absolute shambles at Wolves. 2 games in. 8 conceded.

Our first foray into Europe doesn’t end well. I’m not sure if Wales is classed as Europe technically, but my word the Bolton board must be saints…

Pretty much every goal seems to be “XXXX” gives the ball away… Goal for Opponents. It’s killing us.. Burke’s out for 3 months and we are bottom of the table.

Our best defensive performance of the season. Still lost. Surely the board need to have a meeting soon?

0-2 and we get it back to 2-2 thanks to a Tom Youngs double. Then immediately screw it up and give Wimbledon the lead. Youngs completes his hattrick but the game is already done by that point.

Isiah Rankin joins on loan in time to debut for Anelka whose with the French U21s. He scores and we lead but are pegged back at the end. Our best performance.

Rankin appears to be an inspired signing. Just the 4 and Sunderland are dispatched. It’s that winning feeling. FINALLY!!!

5 in 2 becomes 6 in 3. Arsenal better not recall him.

Rankin, Johnson and Brown are all cup tied, and for a while 3rd Division, and ten man SCARBOROUGH lead.. Tom Youngs gets a hattrick and we eventually make it look convincing. My word we are that scary combination of being half decent or utterly dreadful – nothing in between.

Both ourselves and Newcastle came down last season. They’ve had a better start but despite going behind we end up with the points. Isiah Rankin on fire. So expect an injury or a recall soon.

There is a bit more fight about us now. We should have beaten Reading but responded well to falling behind.

When we got relegated, I envisaged going to places like Port Vale and putting them in their place. Despite going a goal down we leave with 3 points. We are now 16th (woo!!)

I’m not going to think about the fact we conceded 5 goals to a D3 side over 180 minutes. We scored 9. Even Saileti got one. I mean, how sit must you be…

Recognition at last.

Southampton are well placed in 3rd, we dominate but a 1-0 is always a dangerous score in the world of footballing clichés.

Another footballing cliché.. a game of two halves… we destroyed them for 45 minutes and then wilted.

Charlton subbed their keeper after 2 minutes. It worked. Somehow we failed to win another game despite dominating. 2 reds are better than 1.

Rather impressively Mark Fish also played for South Africa on the same day. No wonder he needed to get sent off so quickly.

This game infuriates me. Whenever we look close to cracking it, we fall apart. Which is part of the fun I suppose. Knowing my luck at the moment, we are going to spend the entire save at this level and not win anything!

Thankfully the board seem happy… or they are beyond caring and are trying to destroy everything the trotter faithful hold dear. Time will tell. Until next week.