Whisper it quietly but this is hopefully my new long term save. I haven’t really had any ideas recently, to be honest I’ve been enjoying messing about with the Steam Deck and playing some old games. However, there’s a good plot developing in Italy and sometimes these things awaken the beast a little bit. Let me tell you why Bologna have bought me back to the CM9798 table

At this time of writing – and I will labour this point, because I don’t know when I’ll publish this – Bologna are 4th in Serie A. They have a 5 point cushion to 5th placed Roma and look in a good place to play Champions League football next season. What’s even better is that they are captained by Lewis Ferguson, an ex-Aberdeen Scotland international.

Rewind to 1997 and Bologna have just finished 7th in Serie A but things are about to take a turn. Fabio Capello has arrived at Milan and decided Roberto Baggio isn’t for him. Parma agree to buy the Divine Ponytail but Ancelotti decides the number 10 role isn’t going to take off and stops the transfer. He’s already sold Zola by this point so he’s really doubling down on this lunacy. Anyway, their loss is Bologna’s gain and they swoop in to sign Baggio, who cuts off his ponytail to signal his rebirth (stick with me) and sets about getting in the Italy squad for the 1998 World Cup.

All of the above is astonishingly true. Baggio would lead Bologna to 8th and UEFA Cup qualification before heading off to Inter Milan after the World Cup. I think we can do better though. I think we can get Bologna in the Champions League in 1998 (or 1999. Maybe 2000).

So whilst I talk a good game, the reality is Serie A is absolutely stacked with good teams and only the top 2 get Champions League qualification in 97/98. Basically I’m going to need to sign every one of our favourites and then some.

Here’s our very own Lewis Ferguson

I’m only human

This one is just logical.

In case of emergency, break glass.

I take him everywhere I go.

Time to balance the books a bit. 31 year old Fontolan is out

Paramatti, a DLC, is next to go.

Our first game is a cup tie away at Serie B Cagliari. A banana skin possibility and our squad is not yet finished, but this lot should have enough.

We really do. Even the Micker scores and I wasn’t necessarily planning on using him every week.

The press soon change their opinion

But imagine. Roberto Baggio. The Micker. Romario. Well, you don’t need to imagine it.

He’ll probably be terrible. It feels like a trap. But it’ll sell some fictional shirts.

First game of the season then and Micker is straight into his Italian lifestyle, taking just 6 minutes to open his account. Baggio is purring, pulling the strings and slotting penalties. Unfortunately, our defending is atrocious and I don’t want to blame the keeper but he concedes every shot he faces. Ultimately, we win 5-3 and hopefully a sign of things to come.

It might be. I try the other keeper and he gets sent off just after half time. We’re not great defensively but we seem to have goals in us.

You’ve got to hold and give but do it at the right time. Here’s Barnesy to add to our ludicrous options.

A topsy-turvy encounter with Roma ends in a draw. We trailed, we lead, we drew. Work to be done.

Mr Hanke the Christmas poo arrives.

Howdy ho. Like most Germans in the database his stats are terrible but he was being courted by some decent sides so hopefully a sign his underlying stats make him useful.

He makes his debut in the cauldron of the San Siro. We’re remarkable. We plundered 24 shots and in the end, only winning 2-1 is almost a calamity. But when the whistle goes it sinks in, we’re building something decent here.

As good as that was, it’s a big ask to back it up three days later away to Fiorentina and their formidable strike force. Batistuta and Edmundo don’t get us but Oliveira does. Twice. He does lie down on command though, so there is that.

It’s been a few weeks since I signed an attacking player so here’s another.

Shooting and creativity will do me. I just want options, and lots of them.

We absolutely dominate Vicenza from start to finish but only have two goals to show for it. Romario has been underwhelming, which I did fear but couldn’t resist.

We’re wasteful away at Lecce too but Baggio is on another planet. His brace keeps us in touch with the top 5.

We have to dig deep to beat Empoli, who take the lead but thankfully only for four minutes. Emmers clambers off the bench to win it from a corner. Good lad.

Disappointment follows though at Udinese, where we spent a long time trying to recover from being 1-0 down. When we eventually do take a chance, Udinese go straight up the other end and make it 2-1. Sigh. We concede a third chasing the game. Hmm.

Our frustrations are taken out on Serie C side Alessandria. Romario finally off the mark.

The draw was filled with awful opponents so I suppose being at home is as good as it is going to get.

Juventus are the team to beat and they hold off our pathetic attempts to ruffle their feathers. Even down to 10 they go and get a third. We aren’t at this level yet.

Marchegiani is one of the most annoying keepers on the game. He keeps out all of our efforts and Salah scores on of their very few.

Here’s the situation. The squad is bloated. Our finances are a wreck. I’m trying to flog our reserves but business is slow. I want to buy more luminaries and I hope we will be able to if teams will just throw money at our fodder.

We sit 7th – we were third until the late run of defeats. The keeper is poor too but there’s no money to improve on him, for now at least.

There’s enough to work with though and a long way to go this season. It’s good to be back – see you next week!