Hello there! It’s been hard over the past year to find something to try out that gets me going, something outrageous and stupid enough to be entertaining. So, what better than creating a new nation, and assigning a bunch of retired players from the database, as well as a few who should have been shown as retired, and giving them one last go at the World Cup, way past their prime.

So, what does the squad look like?

There are a handful not called up yet, I’ll reserve the right to switch it about pre-World Cup. The average ability of this side is below the 160 international level requirement, but pretty decent compared to many smaller nations. There’ll be names you know; Schillaci, Maradona, Koeman, Baresi…Quinn. And some new names to get used to. We’ve got a pretty significant array of friendlies that is sure to test just how capable we might be.

So let us get down to it. It’s a great start from the old boys, and its none other than The Micker who opens the scoring. It was all going well except Ronald decided to be a bit of a c***.

Brough Batigol down in the box, the rest is history. We put on a good show with 10-men. It’s a carnival atmosphere in the 90^th minute away to Mexico.

Sweeping changes to the line-up against Norway show we lack depth.

At least we get a decent draw.

It was looking like Czech mate but then the game went silent.

We don’t just worry about the flu, but reaching for a tin of beans from the cupboard. The squad is being plagued by an outbreak of back pain.

This. This isn’t bad. Just need to work on being clinical.

Sent packing back to Russia, with no love.

I cancel the last two friendlies to avoid injuries. And now the day is upon us. Our opening game. And it comes and goes with a whimper, and also losing one of our top players to an injury. Not the best start.

Oh f*** off.

We are desperate for goals, and who should step up but the man himself.

With Yugoslavia facing off against Mexico, we’re through.

Geeeeet up. We embarrass our way through to the knock-out stages.

A tough draw awaits us.

It’s looking like penalties, Schillaci misses chance after chance after chance and then…pops up with a golden goal in extra time!!!

GAME OVER.

That is tough. And it is. We bow out to Italy on penalties.

Not a bad shoot-out at all but it was getting into the ropey end of who can take one. Pride in the Micker burying his.

And with that we are out. It was a good test of these retired players, and gives me a sense they could do a job in one of the top leagues on this game. Can we find out? Who knows.

See you all later.