The thirteenth season of this ridiculous game has come to a close and I have ran out of superlatives for how it has transpired. This is, by far, the oddest season we’ve seen to date. The 09/10 season finished with a World Cup but before that, all sorts of stupid things happened.

League Cup

We’ll keep it simple to begin with, my trophy cabinet is open again

West Ham will at least enjoy promotion back to the Premier League despite this set back.

Premier League

I’m mixing the order up a bit this time to bring you the news that I have retained the Premier League crown, indeed I managed it with a couple of games to spare, so it’s not all that exciting

It is however the bottom where things have gotten really odd

Aston Villa, for much of the 13 seasons, have led the way with Brian Little’s unique brand of attacking football. However it’s the defence that has let them down here, and they are down with a game to spare. To give you an idea of how bad their defence is, look at this Cup Winners Cup Semi final

Just a casual 6-2 loss to Malmo but an away goals win. To make things even more odd, they go on to win the final against Albert Ferrer’s Deportivo

I hope Brian keeps his job, he’s top of the reputation list but do a relegation and a major European trophy cancel each other out? Probably.

Anyway, the last day of the season is here

It’s Keith Gillespie’s Middlesbrough who go down from the 5 possible candidates. Wolves play the following day and draw 1-1 at Birmingham to secure their survival

For completeness, here’s the final standings at the top

A good season for Forest as they take the second Champions League spot, finishing handsomely clear of 3rd placed Man Utd

FA Cup

A good season for Forest gets even better as they book a final spot against Colin Todd’s Chelsea

Pearce will be loving how this has played out, Champions League and the FA Cup!

UEFA Cup

Fergie gets over his double disappointment by winning the UEFA Cup

It’s all too much for some people

He’s replaced by the Peterborough manager, for some reason

Champions League

To complete the treble, I need to do what I have failed to do with Auxerre and Leeds and that is get beyond the Semi finals. Juventus stand in the way

Always loved away goals. Barcelona in the final – Real Madrid have won La Liga and the Copa de Rey, so De La Pena needs this or else he’ll win nothing

Robbie Keane! The Irishman climbs off the bench and scores the winner in Portugal. Get in!

World Cup 2010 – Argentina

There’s no England after Laurent Blanc’s failings, but here are the groups anyway

The home nations hopes rest with Ireland and Scotland, Scotland have a decent group aside from Germany whilst Ireland have to tackle Brazil and former European champions Czech Republic. Holders France have a good group for them, whilst former European champions Spain go head to head with Holland. Hosts Argentina will fancy their chances of progressing.

Very few shocks around all told, Scotland lose all three of their games but Ireland make it through. Otherwise, it’s all gone to form.

Stand out tie here is Germany vs Holland. There’s an all south American clash for Argentina whilst Ireland have the unenviable task of taking on Denmark.

It’s a disaster for Argentina as Colombia topple them on penalties. Meanwhile, Germany edge past the Dutch thanks to my mate Fonzy

Germany/Brazil is the pick here, it’s looking like a blockbuster line up

Germany lay down a serious marker by easily dispatching Brazil. Ronaldo plays surely his last World Cup game. Semi final time.

The holders France will have their work cut out against Germany, whilst Spain/Italy will be an eye catching tie

Germany win through thanks to an OG, the holders are out!

Italy will join them in the final, and as reigning European Champions they have the chance to do the double

France at least claim 3rd

So the final, Germany vs. Italy

Ruthless German efficiency sees them through, a first World Cup win for them since 1990. They’re also going to have a big party in 2014

All that’s left of this season is the awards, and it’s good news for me and one of my youngsters

So that’s it, can the 10/11 season live up to this?

As we steamroller towards the 2010 World Cup, this crazy alternative world has thrown up a series of questions for this update. The most pressing is of course who will Chelsea bring in to replace Kenny Dalglish, the second is are Aston Villa really in relegation trouble and finally, surely Stuart Pearce isn’t going to win the Premier League with this beloved Forest?

Big news up first as there is only one man Chelsea can turn to

The Toddster wastes no time in getting back over to England after what was essentially a brief holiday to Spain. Bravo.

Another manager under pressure is Laurent Blanc. Fingers crossed!

A week of deliberation and the FA decide enough is enough. A truly dreadful reign for Blanc, and now here we are without a World Cup to look forward to. Surely there’s only one man for this job, my application goes straight in

WHAT!? Van Gaal turns his back on Barcelona to leave Alex Ferguson as the only original manager left in the game. I’m furious, what has LVG got that I haven’t besides years of experience and winning everything? Barcelona hire a former player to fill the void

LVG’s reign gets off to a very average start

LVG out! Please. The only positive is that he is old and will hopefully retire in time to let me have a go at it.

Speaking of old, Brian Little looks to have finally ran out of luck. In a change to the usual running order, here’s how the bottom of the Premier League sits at the end of March 2010

Thierry Henry’s absence has really been felt, but the 2 games in hand might save them. Clarky’s Newcastle are dropping like a stone, that goals against column is a problem.

At the end of the last update, Stuart Pearce’s Forest topped the pile and their good form has continued. They’ve also got a big FA Cup game to look forward to

Todd will be eyeing a final appearance already in the other Semi Final. It’s bad news for somebody taking their first steps in management though:

Not to worry Paul, I’m sure you’ll work again

Less than a month later, in fact. Everton sit 20th in Division 1, whilst Hull are 7th. Great time for Scholesy.

At Liverpool, everything is great. The Champions League group was easy in the end

The reward for that was Milan over 2 legs, which seems harsh

A nervy win at Anfield is backed up by a stubborn draw in Milan, we’re through!

We’ll have to be at our best in the Semi Finals though – remember with Leeds & Auxerre, I haven’t been beyond the Semi Finals

From one end of the scale to the other though, I’m also in the pointless cup final against Division 1 West Ham

The league table is looking healthy, with Forest due to visit Anfield in May that could be a huge game

Man Utd are coming back yet again, they just won’t go away no matter how many times they re-build. Fergie has got to be edging toward retirement though. Todd has Chelsea up to 5th, everything Colin touches turns to goals (see what I did there?). Blackburn, post Keegan, cannot be ruled out but having played a game more they’re relying on a Leeds style collapse.

So the final update of the 09/10 season will be along in a few days – I’ve got three cups to win, but the Champions League is the one that has alluded me to date. I’m off to ask LVG to retire.

After my surprise league win to finish the 08/09 season, 09/10 has a lot going for it. My Liverpool side have got Champions League football to look forward to, and there’s a World Cup in Argentina at the end of it all. What is the game going to throw at us this time?

Some well known managers called it quits at the end of the previous campaign

Big Ron worked wonders at Birmingham and his replacement is a little surprising

Michael Kyd gets the player-manager job at Blackburn, I don’t know who he is. Meanwhile Spain celebrate qualifying for the World Cup by sacking their manager

They have done this before…and once against they choose PSG’s manager to take them forward

Fernandez, the former PSG & Spain manager, is actually brought back to PSG

Crazy times on the merry go round. Off it goes again…

Arsenal have really struggled for a number of years now, but this appointment is a bit of a coup

Leeds lost their Champions League qualifier to Real Madrid and with last season’s collapse fresh in mind, he’s obviously decided to move on. After 1 day, he gets manager of the month!

Leeds opt for John Hartson

The PFA player of the year is on the move too, joining Chelsea

Chelsea haven’t really hit the heights they did under Tony Adams but this might help.

The Charity Shield kicks us off, and we destroy Villa

To make matters worse for Villa, Thierry Henry has broken his leg and will miss the season (and the World Cup). Villa are really struggling in his absence and you’ll see later on.

Champions League draw is quite kind

A win in Munich plus 3 wins against Ostrava (twice) and Tblisi mean I’m all but qualified with 2 games to go.

The Premier League has another new leader, this time it’s Nottingham Forest. Stuart Pearce has gone about his business in a very quiet manner and has made them a solid Premier League side, though after finishing 16th last season, few would have seen this coming

I’m unbeaten in all competitions which is nice, but I’d rather be top of the pile. it will come though. My star player is the boy Blades, who’s on almost a goal a game

Chelsea, in 10th, decide that’s enough to get rid of King Kenny

Meanwhile if things don’t improve for Villa, Brian Little might not be far behind!

Leeds also struggling under Hartson, it’s all change once again.

Realistically, England need to win in Wales to try and get 2nd place in the Qualifiers

It’s another Blanc for Laurent though and that’s pretty much curtains. There is one game to go though, so it’s not over just yet. I’ll have your job soon Laurent, don’t you worry.

Join us next time to find out who replaces Dalglish at Chelsea and whether the FA finally sack Laurent Blanc