Won’t it be strange not to play Michael Owen?

Ruining Pulp lyrics aside, welcome to Holland (but not Belgium) for Euro 2000. Firstly, a reminder of the groups:

The World Cup holders, Portugal, are missing after a terrible qualifying campaign which saw Yugoslavia prevail, and they join England in Group A. All of the home nations have qualified except Northern Ireland, so that’s something to be proud of. Anyway, England, still managed by Glenn Hoddle, have picked a decent squad including Real Madrid’s Steve Haslam and a 33 year old Gazza

Blow by blow then, here is how it all unfolded

Group A

The first game of the tournament sees hosts Holland and England play out a 1-1 draw. Shearer puts England ahead but Jordi Cruyff equalises. Yugoslavia edge past Sweden 1-0 and it’s already looking like a tight group. There’s more white hot action as England and Yugoslavia play out a 0-0 draw, Hoddle enjoying a tactical tinker during the first half and actually playing Michael Owen, but to no avail.

Holland and Sweden labour to a 1-1 draw meaning England need to beat Sweden to go through. Hosts Holland need to beat Yugoslavia to avoid being massive disappointments themselves. Fortunately for England, a 2-0 win over Sweden (Beckham and Shearer) sends Hoddle’s men through, but Holland are not so lucky and get hammered 3-0 by the Yugoslavs, meaning the hosts are going home. Or staying home, whatever.

Group B

The Germans are heavy favourites to win this group and achieve this in their usual style, winning all three games without conceding. It’s a battle for 2nd, which Scotland take pole position in by winning the all home nations battle with Wales

Unfortunately for Scotland, the Czech Republic turn them over 2-0 before going on to beat Wales, meaning they take the second spot behind Germany. Wales lose all three games and take the wooden spoon.

Group C

World Cup runners up Denmark are big favourites in this group, though Spain are coming into their own a bit with a host of star names. Spain draw first blood beating Denmark 1-0, whilst Switzerland edge past Slovenia. The Slovenians get a creditable draw with the Danes, whilst Spain can only draw 0-0 with Switzerland. This leaves Denmark vs Switzerland as the key clash, which the Danes win emphatically

Spain thrash Slovenia 5-0 to top the group, and the Danes join them in the quarters.

Group D

You’d expect France and Italy to qualify here and Italy lay down an early marker by thrashing the French 3-0. Ireland lose to Croatia which basically puts the writing on the wall for them, though they do claim a creditable 0-0 draw with Italy. France can only draw with Croatia though, meaning they need a handsome win against Ireland to qualify, and for there to be a winner in Italy vs Croatia. Predictably, Croatia and Italy draw 0-0 meaning Zidane’s late winner against Ireland is in vain. France are out

Here’s the final tables:

Quarter Finals

There’s a big World Cup re-match as England draw Germany, whilst the Czech Republic have a great chance to go as far as they did at Euro 96.

It’s not to be for England though, as Germany win 1-0

Hoddle seemed to approach the match with very little ambition

Anyway, the Czech’s beat Yugoslavia 3-1, Denmark beat Italy 1-0 and Spain ease past Croatia 2-0

Semi Finals

It’s a re-match of the 96 final, only this time Czech Republic win!

In the other Semi final, everybody’s favourite under dogs are at it again, as Denmark reach another major final, after an extra time win.

Final

It’s the final nobody expected but both sides have wrongs to right – the Czech’s were runners up at Euro 06 and Denmark suffered the same fate at World Cup 98. Who will come out on top?

The Czech’s have done it! Who would have thought it?

We’re all off to Italy for 2004!

All that’s left to do is sign off the season with some awards:

I’dl ike to point out that I brought Steve Simonsen to Wimbledon. Also, Marashliev? I don’t know who he is. He looks canny though!

See you for season 4