Welcome back to the journey of a lifetime, as Diogo, the human, and Miguel, the AI, try to co-manage Uniao De Lamas to glory! We left the Lamas last time buoyant after their first two wins, with transfer whizz Miguel on the hunt for potential bargains. So, has he found us another diamond in the rough? Are we now bursting with wunderkids?
Well, no.
As previously, Miguel provided a laundry list of footballers, which Diogo then poured over to find realistic options. This time we had three true candidates:
Kalusha Bwalya, a right midfielder from ‘Minor Team’ in Zambia.
Tommy Smith, a right winger on a free transfer in good old Blighty.
Mikhail Kavelashvili, a long-forgotten striker on a free after being released by Man City.
All three instantly turned us down. I find Lamas is such a small club that even our flimsiest targets are saying no. Hard work this, and Miguel is crushed. I’ve promised him, though, that when we hit big money, we’ll also be hitting his prospect lists!
Time for cup action and a real stat-padder against non-league opposition. We even padded our goals conceded column.
Back in the league, and could we win three straight? Erm, no. 6-1 down at half-time. Non bueno.
Next up, we again shipped a Torreense of goals; the first minute especially seems to be an issue for us. Wake up, lads!
If we’re gonna ship goals, we at least need three strikers to work with. I bring in loanee Fabio from top-flight Farense. Looks like a decent prospect, and he’ll be keen to show his parent club what he can do.
And so it proves, as our man grabs a late winner from the bench. What a game! The board, not as impressed by our away victory as you’d hope, expect a higher league position.
The graphics team grabs the lad for a post-match shot. In Jorge Campos’s goalkeeper jersey for some reason. Law unto themselves, these AI graphics guys. What a head of hair, I suspect the winner was a nicely cushioned header.
Clearly, Farense were watching. Twenty-four hours after Fabio’s debut winner, with his hangover from the post-match celebrations still in place, he’s recalled. The Lamas are gutted, and our search for a third striker is back on.
Captain Pinto is missing for the next game, and it shows as we fall to the league leaders. Once again, it’s the defense that lets us down. Panic buy time!
With Miguel’s targets still way out of budget, we raid the free transfer market. A young Thai international with an unspellable name joins at left-back, and we sign an experienced centre-back in Cape Verde’s Luis Santos. Both go straight into the team as the legend of Tillico grows away at Gil Vicente.
We even go behind against non-league opposition in the cup, but the strikers fill their boots and we’re comfortably through.
With recent recruit Mbarga going great guns on the left wing, I opt to bring in a young backup striker from a top division team. Miguel isn’t happy I spent 150k to do so; he had that money earmarked for Gordon Durie. Dream on, Miguel!
Captain Pinto is out for a couple of weeks with a stubbed toe, and we pick up our third early red card of the season in Estoril. Despite this double whammy, we scrape a 3-3 draw, and it’s another defeat avoided. New man Armando marks his debut with a goal.
Our best performance of the season sees us smash ten-man Uniao 3-0, and we’re on the up!
Tight, but we hang on for the second straight home win. New man Armando is doing the job, and quietly Tilico is channeling his inner Haaland with more than a goal a game this season!
Captain Pinto is back for our visit to bottom dwellers Feirense, and they’re brushed aside after an early scare.
Miguel is snubbed as the Portuguese FA declares only one of the co-managers can be Manager of the Month. It’s a big step for Diogo, who had previously been concerned that the 240k profit on Miguel’s first buy could be the only bright spot of the season!
It’s back-to-back games against Feirense as we take them on in the cup. A poor showing is only rescued by a very late Gabriel equalizer in extra time, so we’ll do it all again soon in the replay. Then comes the big news: win that, and we’re facing Porto. A reminder that Miguel made beating Porto one of our three key challenges at the start of the game, so we may get the first crack at them already. It might end badly with this current crop of players, but you never know!
Pacos Ferreira next up in the league and we’re all over them after a sending-off. It takes us until the 89th minute to find the winner, but we do it. It’s 4 straight in the league!
Cup replay and we’re 5-0 down within 30mins. To Feirense. These boys weren‘t ready for Porto, and this time Miguel has had enough. They get the AI-hairdryer treatment good and proper…
If there’s one thing AI co-managers can do, it’s scare the bejeesus out of our players. The rant at the end of the cup defeat hits the mark, and we take the next game 4-0 at a canter. It’s the fifth straight win in the league. Good stuff, Lamas!
We’ve reached the halfway point in our season. At one point, I was quite worried that this would be a really short challenge, with Miguel and me shown the door after a string of defeats. However, hopefully, we’ve turned things around enough now that we’re safe. Relegation is certainly no longer a concern!
At the top end, we’re ten points adrift of a promotion spot. If there were playoffs, I’d be really confident that we can make our way into them, but the top three could be tough. We’ll see.
Miguel is a maths man; he knows the whole internet, so technically, he is an everything man. Let’s see how he rates our chances of promotion at this point:
I’ll take that!
Tilico is way clear in the goalscorer charts; his fitness could be pivotal to our chances. Tune in next week to see if we can keep this merry ship afloat!