Hello and welcome to Season Four of the Uniao de Lamas AI-inspired saga. Will it be another season lingering in mid-table obscurity, or can Diogo and Miguel finally secure that promotion? Let’s find out.

To kick things off, we’ve tasked Miguel with setting some objectives for the season. After a bit of deliberation, we’ve settled on promotion as our primary goal. Accompanying that, we aim to integrate two of our promising young talents into the starting XI and stabilize the club’s finances.

The youth development options look a bit limited. We have two young regen goalkeepers, so I guess we’ll blood one of them into the team soon. Neville Southall regen looks to be the better option there.

We go regen hunting but only get one bite, as a Semedo regen joins our ranks. He’ll be adopted into the midfield when we can, which’ll tick off Miguel’s second goal for us.

A multitude of other regens reject our offers. We’re unable to entice even the Gary McAllister regen from Ayr United!

Regarding our finances, we’re currently £315k in the red. To meet Miguel’s target, we’ll need to reduce this to £250k by the season’s end.

Our recent additions on the left side of attack have been a bit crap. All they’re good for is a Deesan-Tea. So, a Senegalese prospect joins on a free to give us some decent depth there.

It’s time to dive into action, and for the first game, we’re reverting to the basics. We’ll employ THE formation, stick to a direct style, and place Tilico up top. Considering their underwhelming performances last season, Rufai and Hagi will serve as experienced squad players for now.

We make a very solid start with three points at home. Attendance of 1,655 isn’t going to do our finances any good though!

Kiwi Noah Hickey gets in a tangle with Prunea away at Tirsense, and we go in at half time 1-0 down. Fortunately the pie-father rescues us a point. We picked him up late in season three, and he’s proved to be an upper-crust talent so far.

Next up we race past Estoril, taking top spot on the podium with a 4-1 thrashing!

Less than 1,000 turn up to see us pummel Nacional. You can hear a pin drop in the away end as the Vincent & Tilico double act carve them up.

The team remains unchanged for our fifth straight match, could consistency be the key to getting out of this league? Willy V is required for late goals, but we did have 19 shots to 2 so it’s pretty much a deserved win.

We conclude this update with a romp at Marinhense. Sasi gets sassy with the referee and is sent off though, when 4-0 up! Gabriel picks up an early injury too, so we’ll be having to field a changed team for the first time this season next time around.

We sit second after 6 games, having scored three goals a game. Consistency of team and approach appear to be working nicely.

Rejoin us next time to see if we can keep this fire burning!