Well hello there! There’s just three weeks of CLM left now, but we’ve a bumper edition for you today, with eighteen matches, including action from the league, FA Cup and Europe! So let’s see how this week’s events unfolded as the teams prepare to face each other for one last round…

Philip opened the show, as his Barca class of 92 took on their modern counterparts in their champions league quarter final second leg. Although Philip’s men won on the night, the damage was done in the first leg, and they went out 6-4 on aggregate.

Deano and Andrew kicked off the league action, and battled out a close encounter. Andrew thought he’d nicked a point, but Beetlejuice appeared with a late winner for Deano, leaving Andrew Effen and blinding.

It’s not ideal having your keeper sent off inside the first five minutes, but that’s the hand I was dealt against Nathan. I was expecting a walloping, but a loss is a loss regardless of how many you let in. Well done Nath, cheers Santi.

Ross’ title hopes may be fading by the week, but his players have stuck to the task, and they produced a five-star performance against Dave and his Milan. Keano wasn’t going to be outdone by Cañizares, and chipped in with a red near the end.

Nathan was looking for his second win of the night, and to complete an El Clasico double in the process, but it was just another game, just another goal for Stoichkov, and just another win for Philip at the Nou Camp.

Thomas Strunz received the third red card of the evening, as his Bayern side went down 2-0 at home to Zak and his resurgent Marseille, who after an absolutely abysmal run, are now unbeaten in five matches.

Ross has never hidden his hate for his side, but he had to admire their character against Dean, as they came from behind twice to steal the points, with goals from the baby-faced assassin, the ginger ninja, and golden balls.

Dave endured a frustrating night at the San Siro against Rob’s Red Star, who we’re doing a fine job of holding the Rossoneri, up until they had Sabanadzovic sent off, and Papin spared his manager’s blushes with a late winner.

We’d already established that red cards were definitely the theme for this evening, and myself and Matt both had a man sent off to take the tally to six. There was a hat trick for Suker, and a goal for Del Boy in between.

After Philip’s champions league exit, Zak was the only one left flying the CLM flag in Europe. I didn’t hear his half time team talk, but I think he sent a message to Rudi and told him to stop his messing around, which he did, and scored a priceless away goal to take to the Velodrome.

After the brief European interjection, we’re back to the league. Last time Rob and Philip faced off, Rob came away with an unexpected victory. The score was the same this time, but the other way round, as Philip got revenge.

As that last match was a catch-up, Rob was straight back in action against Dean. So far we’d seen more disciplinary points from Litmanen than goals, but tonight was his night to shine, as he provided four of Ajax’s seven.

After being overlooked by Nathan for most of this season, Stephane Chapuisat is grabbing his long-awaited chance with both hands. Sadly for him, his brace wasn’t enough to stop Ross’ side, as they notched up another win.

Matt’s old lady improved slightly from her loss to me, as she and Andrew treated us to a Desmond. A Ravanelli goal is probably as rare as a Ferrara goal for Juve. Speaking of rare, Kuffour netted for Bayern, followed by the prolific Giovane Elber. Absolute Ob-scenes…

We’d had five games without a red card, so it was about time for another, step forward Fabien Barthez for his third of the season. Stoichkov and Salinas usually grab the headlines for Barca, but Bakero netted his second goal in three games, absolute anchor…

Bringing down the curtain on the league action were myself and Dave. Cañizares was suspended, so I was fuming at Bodo Illgner’s red after ten minutes. On came grey, Barry Coyle, and Milan ran riot. There was time for one more red, as Panucci got number nine.

We finish this week with the two FA Cup semi-finals. First up were Nathan and Philip, meeting for the second time tonight, and once again it was Philip who emerged victorious to book his place in the final. The usual suspects were on the scoresheet, and Bakero seems to be making a late dash for the golden boot…

Andrew entertained Ross in the other semi. G. Nev has chipped in with his share of goals this season, and he opened the scoring. But United never ob-seen an Elber goal coming. Cole regained United the lead and Scholes tied it up on half an hour to set up a final between the top two in the league, who’d have thought it…

So believe it or not, after all those league matches, no one has moved in the table! Philip still has a seven-point lead over Ross, who is a point further ahead of Dave, who is still a point ahead of Dean, who has now doubled the gap between himself and Matt.

As for the bottom half, Zak is now just a point behind Matt, I’m still four behind him, with an eight-point advantage over Nathan, who is now two points further ahead of Andrew, who has pulled a point clearer of Rob at the bottom *takes a well-earned breath*

So there we go, the table might not have changed much, but at least we now know the two FA Cup finalists, and Zak has one foot in the UEFA Cup final. See you all next week for the penultimate episode!