Hello and good welcome! If you missed last time round I have decided to revive the schoolboy signings only challenge and plonk it into the Scottish Third Division. How is it going after 1/3 of the fixtures, well, here is a reminder. C+.

We open this week’s episode with a trip to royal greenery. The ever-influential Tony Folan is on hand to secure a point against top half rivals.

If it looks a bit crap that is because it is/we are. A number of players can’t seem to get going, even at this level, and I cannot decide on my best side. Next up, the Scottish Hawaiian’s visit town.

Alloa are very good, and as such, playing with 10 men for the remainder of the second half, unsurprisingly, does not work to our advantage. We are soon cheered up, though made to cling on for dear life, as two late goals secure a win at promotion challenging East Stirling.

In front of our largest crowd of the season, the kids bottle it in a 0-0 draw in a game we really need to be winning to have any chance of going up.

To add insult to injury, our top scorer with 11 goals in 12 games is now out for 6 months. Hurrah. Half a year until we can ask did ye get healed? Oh well, an even bigger crowd sees us demolish a bunch of older children 6-1.

We secure 3 points against Montrose thanks to our rolling stone of a striker.

As performances go, that is an all-round display despite Lopez’s 6. The happy mood does not continue as we are dumbfounded at Dumbarton.

McKinnon has off ball of 5 and technique of 5 but somehow manages to bang 4 past our paper ‘keeper.

We return to winning ways under the light of the moon as even Premier League Barnsley’s on-loan Dean Bullock can’t spoil our day.

It’s a draw with English Third Division side Berwick. They had 16 shots to our 8 so we can’t moan too much about it.

In the cup, a result out of nowhere. Bob’s your striker and you have a result. Dillon is picking up decent form since Morrison picked up that rather large knock.

It’ll be Division Two Brechin in the next round, so that will be the end of that. This update ends very much the same as it began. We get a good point at royalty.

Paper ‘keeper getting a MotM performance. Just annoying that Mercer sucked the wind from our sails in the 69^th minute.

Tony Folan gets injured and is out for 6 weeks, as is McCaffery at the back. It means we don’t have cover and have to play poorer players out of position. Wonderful. Finally, we take a spanking from Alloa again.

A consolation effort from Graham. Folan is a real miss. The boy is worth over half a million now, has the dreaded BCRC and is performing.

Graham is performing better, and is in the same boat.

We sink from 3^rd to 5^th and our chances look all but over. Whilst the board are satisfied with my performance, they are disappointed with the league position.

Too many draws with opposition in the bottom half and direct rivals. That all said, this is going much better than the last attempt in the English Division Three. Hopefully we can finish the season strongly, keep our job, and find some gems to sign up for season two. See you next time.