Greetings! The aim of the game is to take Ajax right back to the top of the game, and I don’t just mean a flukey win here or there. I want the lot – the Champions League, the Eredivise, the cups – even the World Club Cup. For this season, we need to get back in the elite and hopefully win the UEFA Cup – mainly because I don’t plan on entering it ever again. The league is just about in the bag, let’s seal it in style. Also, there’s a World Cup in the summer. I can’t win it (though that gives me an idea…) but I’ve padded the opening paragraph long enough now. LET’S PLAY DARTS

It’s the last update of the season so I’ll break this down by competition, starting im Holland.

League

There was very little doubt I would win the league after the last update, the only question was if I could remain unbeaten. My 100 points tells you all you need to know.

100 goals scored, 100 poins in the bag out of a possible 102. That doesn’t bother me actually, but it’s going to be very difficult to top that. Can we add the cup to it?

Dutch Cup

I just can’t bring myself to call it the Amstel cup, unless Amstel are reading and want to send me free Amstel for promoting Amstel. Amstel Amstel Amstel. Can’t get enough of that wonderful Amstel. We’re in the Amstel! I mean final. We’re in the final.

The other semi final saw Feyenoord battle TOP Oss. Dutch TV companies were livid.

Take that, David Connolly. Anyway, TOP Oss were not the final opponents I expected but it doesn’t matter to us who we play

Probably a bit harsh to play it in Feyenoord’s stadium after their demise in the previous round. It was also harsh of the ref to dismiss their centre half after 2 minutes, but that’s life.

However, a bigger task was to follow…

UEFA Cup

The third part of our treble attempt saw Valencia in our way. A battling win in Valencia got us through to the final

In our way stood Inter Milan, armed with Ronaldo. Which is fair enough, as we have Gerald Sibon.

A better result than I could ever have hoped

Bit harsh? We’re Ajax ffs.

Let’s see how things have gone on across in England

League Cup

Wow exciting wooo. Pointless.

Next.

FA Cup

At least we might get a Manchester derby FA Cup fin…oh wait.

Leeds you old dogs

The league, however, was less surprising.

Premier League

Least they didn’t get as many points as me.

9 conceded in 38 games is impressive, I’ll give them that. Worthy champions. Bet they can’t win a European competition too though.

Champions League

They’re in the final…

Can Dortmund retain the Champions League? That’d be a feat.

Remember in Euro 96 when Moller scored the winning pen and did that little mincey strut thing? I hope Paul Scholes did it here. How those two events happened in the same minute, I’m not sure, though I imagine Schmeichel saved it and then bowled it out the length of the field, because that’s what he does.

Anyway, if you want to see Moller’s strut it’s here at 7:13. Then laugh.

Where was I? Who knows. For the World Cup, I’m not going through the whole thing because it’s been done so many times. Including in a book a handsome man wrote. So here’s my highlights.

England exited in the group stages after a draw with Mexico and a loss to Argentina and finally Australia

Crikey.

Argentina went on to win, beating Spain in the final. The Dutch were third, beating France in the playoff.

So that’s that then, season one in the bag. Now I have a Champions League campaign to prepare for, the prospect of trying to win everything will be more difficult and, spoiler alert, I’ve got no money to make it happen. This could go wrong quickly – some of this squad are old. Join me next time, won’t you?