Out of the Box Barnsley – Part 24: Clean Sweep

Hello everybody and how do you do? Gonna rock shock your body we’re the cryptik souls crew. Don’t worry, we’re not. That was the words of Len and it is the outcome of trying to answer the question “Did Len do anything good after Steal my Sunshine” and on this evidence, the answer is no. Anyway, back to Barnsley and this could be the post to end all posts, or at least end the season. The mission is to win it all. The Charity Shield is in the bag. The European Super Cup and the World Club Cup soon followed. Let’s achieve!

Lads, this is the opposite of achieving. Our wretched Elland Road record continues as we go 3-0 behind in the first leg of the Pointless Cup. Bodin scores a late goal which gives us something to work with back at Oakwell.

The FA Cup 5th round poses fewer issues. A professional job.

That’s a kind draw too. Good.

It takes extra time but we eventually overcome Leeds. The two goal deficit was wiped out in 20 minutes but it took a further 91 to finish the job.

Probably deserved.

Drama in the other semi final as John Curtis misses the decisive spot kick.

This is a good result at Highbury. Broomes is prone to a bit of tomfoolery every now and again but Bodin and Ron give us another big win.

Another away win at Wimbledon leaves us well clear at the top.

A rotated side ahead of the Champions League quarters sees Digby eventually breakthrough before Broomes settles it.

The first leg is serene – the only downside is 6 weeks out for Charvet.

The second string just about see off Portsmouth to get us in the semi final draw.

Derby beating Liverpool saves us yet another meeting with the Anfield men.

Oh here they are again in the league. A wild 12 minutes sees us 2-1 down but as ever we dig deep and Shaun Newton wins it.

Forest pose no issues to us…

Although they do end Marlon Broomes’ season.

Liverpool won’t go without a fight but in the end, 3-3 on the night sees us through.

Aberdeen! Hopefully they will see off Barcelona and we can get the better of Auxerre.

It’s time to right a wrong from the very first episode. Newcastle’s crippling debts allow me to get the right honourable JC in to replace the stricken Broomes.

He’s cup tied for the Pointless Cup final, where those pesky Sunderland men trouble us again. Eventually the front 2 do their thing and the jobs sorted. Another cup in the cabinet.

3 days later and Auxerre are at Oakwell trying to ruin it all. Compan gets the all important away goal which will make the return leg a tricky one.

The Derby semi final goes well, even if the last 3 minutes are a bit stressful.

The league fixture shortly after is a lot easier.

So 2nd place have 15 points to play for and we are 13 ahead. I like our chances.

As luck would have it, we can secure the title with a point at Old Trafford. Three it is.

Champions! Two to go.

It’s every bit as difficult as expected in France but the reliable Mr Bullock cancels out their away goal. It’s looking like extra time but Zabek snatches the decisive goal at the death. Yes!

Barcelona again…

The task now is to keep the squad fresh for the two finals. We’ve got too many games in a short space of time.

Most of them don’t matter.

Unless we win.

We won here as well.

Then a home loss. Shame.

Ronaldo saves his best for Leeds.

We win at Leicester to finish the season, an extra bonus is Charvet’s full recovery.

92 points? Lovely.

Onto the FA Cup final and it’s a clinic. The cabinet gets another trophy.

Off we go to Germany for our third tangle with Barcelona. We race into a two goal lead by half time and although Barca get the hair dryer treatment, De La Pena has his penalty saved by Simonsen and we’re comfortable winners.

The clean sweep does wonders for your performance points.


A quick check in on the stats and as you can see, Ronaldo and Bakayoko did most of the heavy lifting.

Henry and Charvet were a distant sideshow.

Nobby has to settle for a tie in the average ratings, his broken leg restricting him to 14 apparently brilliant appearances.

Ronny couldn’t quite better last year despite 10 more appearances.

Bullock was a regular throughout the 8 seasons, albeit less so since Henry arrived and Charvet became one of Europe’s greatest midfielders.

A quick look at the awards. No surprise for Ronaldo and I but Castaneda (Blanc regen) started the season out on loan, I had to recall him when Nobby was broken. He’s been superb. Also a surprise to see Harry still at West Ham…and Steve Marlet at Swansea.

There we are then. It took 8 seasons but we’ve won the lot with Barnsley. I did this on the unpatched version to compare the differences, obviously we’ve highlighted the more obvious bugs and changes as we’ve gone through but the game itself plays largely the same. The biggest game breaker is the finances – not being able to go over £50,000 with £80m in the bank is annoying and indeed during the final season my wages were capped at £25,000 for some reason. It was all patched out, so not a complaint – I knew what I was getting myself in for. The player values are inflated too compared to the patch, but that’s not really a problem.

Thanks for your support and reading the past 24 weeks. I’ve done this for 7 and a half years now, the next stop is the 25th anniversary in October which will be the CM Cup too. I don’t know if I’ll be back before then. Have a great summer and goodbye for now.

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