14 games left in our season, on the back of 3 straight clean sheets AND wins. Nicely poised you’d think?
Watch me lose the next 14 games and finish midtable and win nothing.
True, we probably can’t win anything this season, but maybe a top 4 finish could get us something in Europe – another avenue?
Everyone’s favourite ginger does the business against Barnsley
Hello and welcome back to the 30 for 30 challenge in which the aim is very simple. Get to the last page of the game. After the high of winning our first Premier League title we found life tough at the top and finished 5th last season. Let’s try and recapture the title.
August/September
Big news to start the season. I received an offer I couldn’t refuse.
My name? Gary Goals. My mission – to fire up the iPad and prove that Ossie was right, by taking a team to the top exclusively using the All Out Attack formation.
The rules are simple – no varying from this formation, ever. If we’re 2-1 up in the Cup Final and have two men sent off, we’re sticking with our AAA. It’s never worked before; the old Keegan style ultimately turned out to be ‘if they score 4, we’ll score 3’. For us, though, if they score 7, we’ll simply score 8. Nothing, and I mean nothing, can go wrong!
Goes without saying that we’re certainly not editing the database in any way, or looking up who any regens are – that’s for speccy ‘laptop managers’ and the Goals dynasty is as old school as they come. Launch it direct and stick it in the net.
We’re going to start this journey in sunny Angus, in Montrose to be precise. The loyal following at the Links Stadium is going to witness a barrage of goals, gaffes and gonzo-ings.
To start with – recruitment. My squad is bloated with hot garbage, and I have next to no money – so first up is this lad, who has absolutely no technique, dribbling or flair, and should fit right in at this level.
Hello & welcome to a new blog series! As you can see we’re in Merthyr Tydfil. This is the closest club in the English pyramid to me. I’m from Abercynon so just a few mins up the A470. I nearly signed for Merthyr as a 16 year old. Scored 2 against their U-18s in a friendly in a 4-2 deafet, and they invited me along to train with them after the game. But while younger me was pretty decent at scoring goals, I was also pretty decent at scoring weed. Loads of old blokes got a story about how they could have made it. That’s mine. 3 training sessions and I didnt bother going again. Had other ‘interests’. I’m back now as a slightly more responsible 40-year-old as the first team manager. But the contract and rules they signed me up on are restrictive. And the owner/main sponsor is rather bizarre.
Continue readingLet’s take a moment to have a look at the startling progress made in this save already. Yeah, it’s been non-stop, wall to wall improvements.
The real Sir Alex picks up the October Manager of the Month award as his boys top the table, he’s also accepted a bid for OGS. But he tells us where to go. AGAIN.
Continue readingHello and welcome back. It’s taken 20 seasons but we finally won the Premier League! Our first top division title. After slugging it out in the basement of Scottish Football and the near misses it was the best title win ever. But it’s not the end of this journey. We are still aiming for that final page. So let’s crack on as Champions.
August
Here it is. The last big chance for more glory. We’re eyeing up the final shot for these Georgian ladzes – you can catch-up here. It’s a real shame we won’t get another shot at the Euros, but if we manage two World Cups that would be outstanding.
Our preparation starts where we left off 2005:
Góðan Dag my Heathen friends. Velkomin back to 872 AD where we’ve completed our objectives of becoming Champions of England. A clean sweep including the added bonus of the Charity Shield at the beginning of last year meant that with every domestic trophy along with European cups in the cabinet, I’d lost a bit of motivation. When Norway came calling just 1 game into the season and in a European Championship year, it was just the perfect opportunity to complete this challenge.
We qualified with ease and then won our Group beating Germany, Belgium and Bulgaria. Scotland were brushed aside in the quarters and reigning champs France were just as easily dealt with. Unfortunately, Italy’s home advantage gave them the edge in a tightly contested final in which we lost 1-0.
I wanted to continue to see just how far I could take this team which is full of attacking talent…some of whom hadn’t even had a cap till I took on the roll. So with that said, get yourself comfy and saddle up for a biggy!
Continue reading‘One More Time’ sang Daft Punk back when I was a scrawny young lad at Uni. Fast forward to 2023 and for one more Saturday we’ll pay a visit to our latin lovers.
There’s been many a big name signed that has flattered to deceive and many an unknown starlet lighting up St James Park. So after nearly 9 full seasons of fun and frolics, the trophy cabinet shows:
2 x Premier League Titles, 3 FA Cups, 1 Charity Shield and 1 Uefa Cup.
It should be more really, we’ve been runners up in the league once, the Champions League once and the league cup once. Twice in the Charity Shield and once in the Cup Winners Cup.
Continue readingIt’s time again to pick up the challenge of trying to replicate what Sir Alex did at Manchester United, but with Bolton Wanderers. This is season 6 and currently we have won nothing of importance – or nothing that is comparable to the great Scot.
We’ve won a Division One Title and a FA Cup Runner’s Up medal. We are also finding it very tricky to convince anyone with Premier League experience to come on down.
